Here’s Your Tip November 12, 2007

In almost all situations, I tip 20%. Good service at a restaurant? 20%, baby. Good service at a bar? At least 20%. A good haircut and color? Again, at least 20%. There is one place I never, ever tip: Starbucks.

It occurred to me several years ago that tipping at Starbucks, or any other such establishment, is ridiculous. The employees do not make a waiter’s or waitress’s wage. They do not rely on tips to survive. They stand behind a counter, take your order, take your money, and fill your order. Just like I did when I worked at Dairy Queen. And Subway. And the donut shop that employed me in college. No one tipped me for DOING MY JOB. I’m not saying that I do not appreciate the effort it takes to make my mocha, I’m just saying that guilting me into tipping will not work. And I feel the guilt. The pressure to leave my change in that goddamned jar is not lost on me. But I resist.

Several years ago, I was visiting a good friend who lives out of state. We cruise through the Starbucks drivethru, and when I see her rifling through her wallet after paying for our beverages, I snapped, “What are you doing???” She looked at me, panic-stricken, and said, “Tipping them.” I got on my soapbox and gave her the speech I typed above. She agreed with me and stopped tipping at Starbucks. I am sorry to report the guilt has won, and she resumed her previous tipping ways.

When the hubby and I met, same deal. He still doesn’t tip. Yay! A victory, of sorts. Again, I’m not saying that Starbucks employees don’t deserve to make decent money. All I’m saying is, it’s not your job to pay their wage. Isn’t shelling out $4 for a coffee enough?

For the record, I also don’t tip the guys in Vegas who “hail” your cab. They’re just standing there while the cabs line up. No way, dude. Tipping the guys who check you in curbside at the airport? Yes, I did tip them, out of fear. Now that you are charged an extra fee for using this service, fuck no. I’ll take my bags inside. I stopped tipping furniture delivery men. Again, not my job to pay your wage. The list goes on and on.

The next time you’re in a situation and to tip seems not quite right, it probably isn’t. Don’t do it out of guilt. Do it because you want to.

Betcha Didn’t Know That November 12, 2007

Thankfully, I was tagged by a fellow blogger to reveal 5 things about myself. Check out her wonderful responses here.

1. I love filling out surveys and questionnaires. There’s no better time-waster than logging on to www.mysurvey.com and sharing my opinions with whomever, then earning points for doing so. To date, I’ve cashed in enough points for gift cards to Amazon.com and Bath & Body Works. Free books and lotion for answering questions? Sign me up! Those forwarded e-mails that we’ve all received 20 times asking if you prefer vanilla or chocolate? I fill them out every single time.

2. Watching people win on gameshows makes me tear up, and sometimes even cry. This phenomenon began in 1999 (the worst year of my life to date) when I was unemployed for 5 months. I would get up each day, shower, watch The Price Is Right, and cry at every contestant’s good fortune. Then, I would eat burritos for lunch, then head to the local library to use their free computers and internet to apply for jobs. A couple of weeks ago, I almost lost it when a guy missed winning the jackpot on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? by one question. He was so sweet and earnest, I’m about to tear up just thinking about it.

3. I rotate plates. And bowls. And cups. And glasses. What does that mean? Every time I unload the dishwasher, I put the newly cleaned plates, bowls, cups, and glasses at the bottom of the stack or the back of the line. Oh, and I do this with canned goods, too. I do this for even wear. It matters not that all of these dishes were procured at different times. My husband thinks this is nuts. My mother even thinks it’s nuts. My father, on the other hand, thinks it perfectly natural. This is the man who buys socks in bulk, then numbers them to keep the pairs together. So if you’re ever sitting in my dad’s living room and he walks by you in socked feet, there will be a number written on the instep of each sock in black magic marker. This also tells him when one is missing. Brilliant and crazy.

4. Without a list, I am a woman run amuck. Not just grocery lists. Lists of things to do. Lists of Christmas gifts. Lists of gift ideas months in advance. As a third grader, a list of kids in my class I did not like (yes, I was caught with said list and punishment ensued). Marking things off of a list is so satisfying, I can hardly stand it.

5. I despise being told what to do, even if it’s the right thing. I guess the resistance to authority began with my dad, but who knows? The baby seems to possess it in spades. Don’t get me wrong, I can take direction at work. Admitting I’m wrong is not a problem. But someone telling me I CAN’T do something? Watch out. I will cut off my nose to spite my face. And prove a point.

And now I’m tagging every person who reads this. Leave a comment sharing 5 things about you.

House Numbers… November 12, 2007

26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31-40.

26 – the yard was too small. And there were holes in the walls so doorknob locks could fit into them. FOR REAL. Hey, genius, spent 50 cents and buy one of those door stopper things.

27 – the yard was too small.

28 – the yard was awesome. There was a fucking WINDOW UNIT AIR CONDITIONER in one of the rooms. For $250k, I expect central air and heat. Am I wrong?

29 – the yard was too small. The upstairs was awesome, though. Apparently the owners are total stoners. I have never seen so many snacks stashed in a bedroom before. On the nightstand’s exposed shelf and tons of eats in the closet.

30 – it fits all of the criteria, but we weren’t excited about it. You should be excited about a place before you start paying $1500 a month to live there for 30 years. Am I wrong? We didn’t even ask our agent to show us this one. We’re almost embarrassed to call her at this point, so we called the listing agent and she met us as at the property. Considering it’s been on the market for 6 months, wouldn’t you think she could answer “who is the cable provider?” off the top of her head? Nope. She also wasn’t sure if the flooring in the entryway was laminate or hardwood. I said, looks like laminate to me. She agreed. Uh huh.

31-40 – we just drove by these. It’s amazing how little you have to see to say no.

We’ve actually driven by at least 50 houses and eliminated them, so these numbers are quite conservative. If I stop to think we’ve already put 100 houses in the “no” pile, I’ll probably start crying right now.